Depression Quest

Developed and written by Zoe Quinn utilizing the Twine Engine, Depression Quest is a choose your own adventure interactive fiction that explores the themes and experiences of living with depression.

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“Depression Quest is a game that deals with living with depression in a very literal way.”

“The goal of this game is twofold: firstly, we want to illustrate as clearly as possible what depression is like, so that it may be better understood by people without depression.”

“Secondly, our hope is that in presenting as real a simulation of depression as possible, other sufferers will come to know that they aren't alone, and hopefully derive some measure of comfort from that.” 

“After all, that's all we can really do with depression - just keep moving forward. And at the end of the day it's our outlook, and support from people just like you, that makes all the difference in the world.”

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To me, one of the most fantastic things about video games is the active role of the audience; the experience presented is interactive and (hopefully) engaging. Games have been able to mold and explore all kinds of themes and messages both lighthearted and grim. Depression is certainly more on the grimmer side, but it’s such a fragile and personal experience; how can one even begin to explore it? —It’s like trying to explain what chocolate tastes like to someone who has never tasted chocolate before. Although Depression Quest holds good intentions in acting as a tool for someone to begin to understand depression, the game’s limited narrative presentation and lazy execution fails to uphold its goals of exploration and understanding of depression.

So here’s the premise of Depression Quest: you’re a male in his twenties working a dead-end job while juggling relationships with family members, a girlfriend, all while trying to stay motivated to continue functioning. As with most choose your own adventure games, Depression Quest offers you a prompt with options on how to act. There is musical accompaniment that is mostly a looping track with subtle changes in tone when the story takes place in differing areas and paths. And that’s about all you can say about gameplay, which is fine—by no means is complexity a singular ingredient for success. So what about the narrative and the depth of the choices available?

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The choices in the scenarios are all black and white and carry no weight to them. Every time I was given a prompt, I knew what the “good” and “bad” options were. Now, I’ve never been clinically diagnosed with depression, but I think it would seem patronizing to any with depression to give a “right” and “wrong” response to everything so blatantly. The focus on actions rather than what prevents you from taking other, more positive actions (you can’t do that because you’re too depressed) is a hugely wasted opportunity to actually explore the intricate emotions associated with depression other than simple lack of motivation or stress. With a condition like depression, there are rarely any clearly defined paths to take and trying to present depression to people who have never experienced depression before in such a manner feels like a huge injustice. The choices in the game are boiled down so much—“Do you want to go to therapy?” the game will ask you; “Yes” or “No”? It’s a no brainer; there’s no point in thinking about the actions you take. Depression can be a chronic, lingering lull and to reduce it to such a small frame of reference is hardly effective in representing depression to others.

That isn’t to say the game isn’t noble in its intention. You have to remember: this game is meant as a tool for understanding and, despite its simplification and superficial outlook on depression, it is exactly that. Depression Quest gives a window into the world of depression forged by the developer but that window is small and murky. But Depression Quest is still an outreach; it’s an extended hand to show people with a similar case that they aren’t alone, and that is cause for applause.

I can’t shake off the feeling of disconnect between myself and “You.” I was thrust into the shoes of the protagonist “You,” but I didn’t feel like I could really empathize with “You” as a player. There was just such a disjoint knowing that “You” wasn’t me. It felt like the narrative was imposing a character onto me rather than me placing myself into the story, but in a forceful and unnatural way. The game was telling me how I should feel and that disconcerting notion simply did not resonate in my understanding of depression.

You know, in retrospect, maybe that’s what the game was going for all along: the seeming image of control and knowing what’s good for you, but having the simple inability to act on them because of unexplainable reasons. There isn’t a why or how, there’ just a you-just-can’t mentality associated and ingrained with depression. Perhaps this is what Depression Quest was trying to depict, but maybe I’m reading between the lines a little too much.

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To understand the abstract, it is often helpful to create a simplified model. Unless you have experienced depression first hand, there may never be an adequate recreation of the emotional and physical experiences associated with depression. Depression Quest tries to simplify depression with good intentions of deconstructing depression for better understanding, but instead it may have gone too far in its demolition.

There are a lot of reviews and critiques out there bashing the game for various reasons- it’s too short; I have depression and this game didn’t help me; the game misrepresents depression; I can’t get into the story—I can’t help but feel that these people have missed the point of what Depression Quest is really all about. The game is the amalgamation of the experiences of the developer and several other people; it’s like a case study. Depression Quest isn’t supposed to be a voice for people with depression. The game isn’t going to be representative for all cases, but it’s one of the small keys to unlocking an image and understanding of what really goes on with depression.

I’m all about taking anything from a bad experience so I’m just going to finish with this suggestion: Depression Quest, like depression, isn’t something you have to experience alone. Tell some friends about it and go through it and maybe talk about the game’s merits or demerits. It could be the worst game you’ve ever played, but maybe you can find something worth a pat on the back.